The story of Aaron Armenteros, a young transsexual in Havana, Cuba: "My fears keep me alive"
- Submitted by: admin
- 03 / 07 / 2019
Aaron Armenteros is a 31-year-old transsexual boy from the Arroyo Naranjo municipality. Manage, along with his girlfriend Liset Arce, facebook page LGBTI Force + Cuba where he wants, in his own words, to publicize the diversity that exists in terms of sexuality.
"We all have to unite and function as a community, in order to demand our rights from that part of society that does not understand." That is why he began telling his story, with which many identified themselves, and thus gain the trust of others like him, to tell them that they are not alone and that they can become a great family.
Account that when small, in primary education, had many problems. "I did not want to dress as a woman, I did not attend school, I ran away, the neighbors did not let the girls play with me because they said I was" machorra ", I always walked with men".
He grew up in a Christian home and therefore attended the services, where he began to question certain matters of the faith and his own reality. "I remember some neighbors, lesbians, to whom the pastor told them that they could be Christian but that they had cured their illness. That contradicted the upbringing that they gave me, the message that God loves everyone equally, that God is love. "
As he grew, so did his rebellion. He ran away from home to the park on Calle G, he was part of the Havana urban tribes and decided to tell his mother the whole truth. "She threw me out of the house, my dad turned his back on me and the only person who welcomed me was a gay boy, whom I had met a day before." There he dressed with the clothes of his new friend and although he had long hair he picked it up. "I loved it. In the street they confused me with a man and I loved that. That's where my transformation began. "
Luckily for Aaron, over time, he and his mother reconciled. Returning home brought as a result that she would win a new son, willing to never wear women's clothes again.
But his would still be a home for Christians and, although he confesses to believe and love God, when he had the opportunity to have the pastor of the congregation in front of him, he confessed his interest in biblical teachings, but that he liked women . "The pastor told me yes, I could continue in the church, but if they prayed for me and took away my illness. How will I have an illness? That's how I stopped going to church "After finishing school, he started working. First in a bakery, then in a funeral home cafeteria. It is in those years that he meets a girl, with whom he had a relationship, which tells him about transsexuals. "I started looking for information online because I did not know what that was" he confesses and laughs at being ignorant, at that time, about his own reality and situation.
What has been the life of a young man who had to wait too long to find answers to his own doubts? How much pain can a person endure only because they are not understood by those around them?
"I would not have words to express my feelings. It has been 31 very long years. Days of not wanting to talk to people so they do not realize my voice, not to go out to the street so they do not look at me as if I were a weirdo, not to go into a public bathroom so as not to be embarrassed, to live Without wanting to look in a mirror and hate my body for causing me so many problems.
I have come to think about taking my life because I have not found a way out and ... "At that moment the words are knotted in his throat. Only those who hear him speak will know how to interpret the pain caused by a voice drowned out by tears that will not run this time.
"I've been a coward for feeling loneliness, emptiness, a lot of absence. Although I have many people who love me, that is not enough. I feel that I'm missing something, for myself as a person. I do not understand why I had to live this. I wonder if I will be able to face this martyrdom every day and continue suffering every second, which can not even be avoided. You just have to live it and face it. "
Aaron talks about his fears with total courage. He says he has not overcome them and he is not sure if that happens. "I only learned to live with them and they have made me feel better person. Today I am respectful with others, even if they do not respect me. I have learned to love with intensity, not to deceive or judge anyone. Thanks to those fears I keep going, fighting every day for the people I love. " Among those people are his mother and his girlfriend who, for eight months of relationship, has taught him a lot.
Her name is Liset Arce and she studies Accounting and Finance at the University of Havana. They met at the Singer Café of the National Theater. There every Saturday night the LGBTI people of the capital have their space. It was the first time she visited the nightclub and that's how she met Aaron. "He told me that the psychologist had recommended him to present himself with his man's name, because he was on sex change plans. I did not care, I had male and female partners. I do not consider myself bisexual because I fall in love with the personality. "
Remember that everything was new at first and he thought about what would happen after Aaron's operation. But he realized that he was falling in love with his ideas, his actions ... "and in that moment all the thoughts and the fear that he left me to like disappeared completely."
Four months ago, Aaron began his hormonal process. During all this time he and his girlfriend have experienced the change that is experienced. They have enjoyed together what comes with each injection. Then their face lights up. The one who was born one day as a woman, waits for the time to finally say! "And laugh like I've never laughed and cried with happiness."
As an LGBTI activist, he believes that "although CENESEX exists, you really need to work much more in schools and in society in general. I know many people in the same community who do not know that in Cuba you could change sex. Nor is there a space where diversity is explained within the same diversity. The mentality of our society is still very behind in terms of these issues and they reject them, although they tolerate homosexuality a little bit. "
That is what Aaron and Liset propose with the LGBTI Force + Cuba page. They are convinced of being able to advance as a country, especially when the countdown has begun so that in two years the Family Code will be submitted to popular consultation. With a new law he can enjoy rights such as marriage, adoption or the construction of a family that is not heteronormative. He had high hopes with the deceased article 68 of the Constitution Project that was discussed a few months ago, to the point that he publicly offered his girlfriend a marriage. Now he must keep the rings and fight so that in 2021 Cuban society will accept them as they are.
"How to change reality?" He asks. "My intention is not to pity, but to be an example of overcoming. I become stronger and I want to transmit that strength to others. I hope to make it".